I say I’m a natural submissive but after today’s ponderings I have to question if this is true.
Yes I have a need to submit, the desire to have someone else in control and the will to follow through with it. I have a hunger to be dominated in all aspects of life and a real yearning to trust someone so completely that I’d comply with whatever they wanted. I possess an honest eagerness to be a “Good girl” to the point that it motivates me to strive and do what pleases the other person. There is a thrill in knowing that I’m with someone who has a passion for leading us both down the path we so willingly want to travel. Someone who isn’t afraid of showing and exerting their authority over me and would never concede to my bratty ways.
Which leads me to my next point. I can be a brat. (at least I’m honest) I’m an only child and was the only grandchild for years. I was spoiled rotten growing up and usually got whatever I wanted. (I wonder if this has anything to do with me wanting the opposite now) I have a big mouth and am not afraid to use it. In fact, it’s the culprit of what gets me into trouble every time. I’m opinionated, stubborn, bossy, and down right bitchy at times. Then how in the world can you say you’re submissive, you ask?
The above mentioned character traits may not be the best, but I own them. (no worries, I have just as many, if not more, positive traits within me) Here’s the thing…When I say I have that need and desire to relinquish control…That thirst to be disciplined…I only have that need with T. I could never in a million years give anyone else my unconditional trust and bow down to them as I would her. As we discussed before, yes I “played” with BDSM years ago but it was just that, playing. At no time did I ever, submit or commit my entire self to another, nor would I ever…Unless it’s T. The craving I have to be “Her’s” is so powerful it can’t be denied. My mouth may (I’m positive!) still get me into trouble with T from time to time but my unwavering submission will always remain for her.
In conclusion, yes, I believe myself to be that natural submissive I claim to be. Just because I can only see myself being so connected to one person doesn’t make me less of one.
Thoughts? Comments? Jump on in and let’s hear it.
Until next time…I’m Trulyhers