Something I hope to do in my life…
Gosh, I suppose there’s lots I hope to do and achieve during my life…I have a blog post about my life goals, so of course those things are on the list, but if I had to choose one thing it would be to live without stress, in a world where everything is rainbows and butterflies.
Unfortunately this isn’t even possible. I always try to see the good in everyone and everything but am always left feeling unfulfilled or let down. Most of the people I’ve encountered lately are more concerned with what they can get from you rather than having a positive outlook and reaching out to be helpful or even concerning themselves with the feelings of others.
I hate feeling like this. I’m usually such a happy-go-lucky person, always smiling and lending a hand to help someone, always caring about others feelings, but lately I’m in such a dark place because I’ve allowed others and their selfish actions to affect me. I used to always go about my day with happiness but now I find myself dreading even getting out of bed knowing the people I deal with on a daily basis are so self serving and rude. I’ve allowed them to take the smile from my face and the happiness from my heart.
What really angers me is that no matter how others treat me, I still end up being the nicer person when what I really want to do is cuss them out and punch them in the face. Have you ever carried on a conversation with someone knowing your smiling on the outside and pretending everything is great when what you really want to do is beat the shit out of them? LOL
I’m serious people! Is it that I hate those thoughts or is it more that I’m obviously weak enough that I allow others to have such a negative effect on me?
I guess I just want to be happy. I just want to live in a world where everyone is as nice and caring as me. That’s something I hope to do in my life…Just live in an alternate reality where everything and everyone is super sweet. If only this were feasible and not too much to ask.
Sorry my posts have been sort of “down in the dumps” lately…I need a change. I need to get out of this crappy place and not let others bother me. I understand I’ll never achieve true happiness until I gain the ability to not let toxic people into my life. I need to let them and their shit roll out of my life like water rolling off a duck’s back.
Maybe my next post will be more positive…
Until Next Time,