A Journey Begins…


Isn’t it pretty cool that no matter how well you think you know someone, you can always find out more when you sit down and talk.

T and I had a pretty intimate conversation yesterday about things we’ve never really discussed. They are personal to say the least so I won’t go into what the subject matter was, but the cool thing is we discovered new things about each other.

Things that I’d never confide in anyone else, I came out and told her. It’s nice to not be met with judgement or ridicule but with open arms and an open mind. During our conversation not only did find myself pouring these details out to her but I discovered she enjoys the same things I was fearful of admitting.

The fact that she was also overjoyed about the subject matter made things even more comfortable for me and I’m much more relaxed and can’t wait to be snug and warm in her arms forever. When two people have unconditional love and trust for another, anything is possible and nothing should be off limits as long as both people agree and enjoy it.

Without a doubt, we both believe that we were meant for each other. With each passing day, and the more we discuss topics, I’m finding that this belief is further proven to be correct.

Anyone who knows me will tell you I’m an extremely inquisitive person. Having this trait allows me to be open with T and in turn, provides us the opportunity to learn new things about each other. Communication is key. I wonder if she ever gets tired of me bringing up new and different things to talk about but I just can’t help it. It’s in my nature to question, discuss and discover.

I look forward to a lifetime of discovery with you T. Who knows what the future holds with the two of us living as one with our unbreakable bond.



Posted in BDSM, being alive, communication, grateful, happy, honesty, life, listening to others, Love, relationships, thankful | 1 Comment

Day 6 of truth challenge…


Something I hope I never have to do in my lifetime…

I hope I never have to bury my children. I’m pretty sure this is a universal fear of all parents. I just can’t even imagine having to go through the agony of the death of your child and I can’t imagine anything worse.

Your children are supposed to grow to have happy lives while you sit back and smile knowing they are living life and enjoying the world around them. To see them in pain is hard enough but to have to plan their funeral and bury them would be more than I could bare.

I don’t think I could go on knowing I’d never be able to speak with them or reach out and touch them again…Never be able to hear their voice. Did I tell them I loved them enough? I think I’d be miserable forever always wondering if I could of done something to prevent whatever tragedy took them from me.

Do you have a fear or something you hope you never have to experience?


Posted in 30 days of truths, BDSM, fear | Leave a comment

Day 5 Truth Challenge…

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Something I hope to do in my life…

Something I hope to do in my life is make a difference in someone elses and to be remembered for doing so. While I’m alive for sure, but when I’m no longer here on this earth, I’d like for at least a few people to be able to say that I made a positive impact on their life. And I’d certainly like to be remembered for my sarcastic and fun sense of humor.

I’ve always been a fun and caring person and would like to think that some of the unselfish acts I’ve done throughout my life were appreciated and actually helped someone. With having been a foster parent in the past I know I’ve had to reach at least one of them. They have all since returned home, gotten married and started a family, or were placed with other foster homes but all of them keep in touch with me and it’s this that I’m thankful for.

I think it would be so awesome to be really old, like in my 80’s or 90’s and have someone come to me, remind me of who they are and tell me that I was the reason for them changing their life or something great like that.

What do you hope to do in your life?


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D/s and ANR…


Okay, so this is a post about perspective and how differently T and I think…Annnd a little info thrown in there for anyone who’s interested.

I accidentally came across an article on ANR (adult nursing relationships) This is a relationship between two adults where the couple induces lactation. The article I found was about ANR in relation to BDSM and D/s relationships.

I found several posts where the Dominant partner would have his/her submissive begin lactating, with his/her assistance of course. I couldn’t wrap my mind around this idea. As a submissive, I could totally see where the Dominant would lactate in order to have her sub more connected, bonded and dependent on her. But how could a Dominant possibly benefit from having his/her sub produce milk?

In our relationship, T is a Mother figure among other things. So, myself being the submissive, I could comprehend how the Dominant partner would want the submissive to “nurse or suckle” on her breasts. I hear the bonding experience is like no other. But what about the other way around? Having your submissive lactate? 


When I approached T and asked her how a Dominant could possibly benefit from having her submissive lactate, this was her response…She automatically saw it from the Dom perspective and said she could see where it would be a whole new rhelm of control over your submissive. Controlling her body and when she could and couldn’t milk. Having to depend on the Dom to allow you this relief would be a benefit considering the submissive is that much more defendant on you in a completely different way and on a completely different level.

I don’t find the practice of this surprising at all, I’m open minded to almost anything and everything, and if I’m being honest, there’s a very arousing aspect to this idea. What I did find surprising was the fact that lactation could be induced in a non pregnant woman. This subject is extremely interesting to me and has opened up a whole new world of research. And as always, T and I enjoyed discussing this from different perspectives. My eyes were opened to how and why it could be an attraction from a Dominant view point. It’s so cool to see how our minds work in different ways. Her’s from a Dom stand point, mine from a submissive view.

Here’s a couple of links in case anyone finds themselves as inquisitve as myself 😉




Happy reading and as always I welcome any comments, knowledge or experience on this subject.

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Second Life Question…


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I’m curious to know why people play Second Life. Is the BDSM aspect of it the attraction? Is there anything other than kinky stuff that goes on in that game? Not that I want to play but I’m curious…Any feedback would be great!

When I search SL online NOTHING but bdsm stuff comes up…Dom’s here and there, slaves everywhere…whips, chains and floggers…cuffs, gags, and even alternate world bdsm clubs you can attend… You name it. It seems to me that you’d have to have some interest in this kink in order to play in this world. Do people use this as a means of meeting others? Do people build relationships in this world? Would it be common to find players who are not there to meet others?

There’s even tutorials online about how to have sex in the game…It seems rather graphic…

Get the tool!

I am sure you have noticed that your avatar comes without genitals. Hence the first thing you need to do, get yourself a penis/vagina. Here a piece of advice: Second Life is a visual medium. Hence it does have a certain importance that you choose a penis that actually looks realistic and is in-line with the color of your skin.

There are freebie penises  around, but from what I have seen they look horrible. It is certainly not a turn on to look at an avatar, with a cock that looks like made of wood and is in a totally different color then your skin. At this point it does make sense to invest a little bit of money to get one that looks decent and realistic. They usually come with a color changer, which allows you to adapt its color to the color of your skin. For the sake of aesthetics, please make that effort!

Contrary to common believe: Size does actually matter, but within reason. You want to make love not an impalment.

Some people find those xcite attachments very sexy. They actually react to clicks on them in open chat. I personally crunch at the thought of a talking penis. I have yet to find out why people buy this stuff. But hey, if it rocks your boat, go ahead get a talking penis.

We all know I’m a RL submissive and have no objections to the lifestyle, the kinkier the better.However, Seeing as I’ve never played the game but others I know do, I’m curious to know exactly what it’s all about. =) I look forward to hearing your opinions!



Posts: 19

Whats the day of a BDSM slave like?


‎01-23-2012 08:31 PM

I am thinking about becoming a BDSM slave in SL and would like to know what the day of a slave is like. Is there a way i can go somewhere and “watch”?

I mean, it has to be more than just kinky sex, right? Are there some slave schools in SL? (BDSM, not Gor!)

Or can anyone give me an example what a slave does during the day?


No two relationships are the same. Neither are two Dom/mes the same, or two subs/slaves. Some will require chores done on a more or less regular basis, some won’t. For some, playtime is important and they do it a lot. For others, it’s more personal and less play. In other words… there’s no “normal day” for a BDSM couple, just like there is none for a vanilla couple.

If you’re interested in getting to know people, look for a nice and friendly sim, get to know people, and when appropriate see if you can find a mentor you’re comfortable with. The worst thing you can do is throw yourself at the feet of the first Dom or Domme you see. Even worse is committing to the first stranger that demands to collar you.

My favorite hangout is Velvet Thorn (femdom oriented), as it’s a very relaxed and casual community. Even if femdom isn’t your thing, it might be a good starting point to ask questions and find a sim that better suits your desires.

There are also some places that offer classes, though personally I feel they’re not necessary. In most sims you can get a notecard with the local rules, and some rules are more or less universal: Don’t IM people without their consent, be polite and curteous and so on.

Bottom line: Be careful of idiots, don’t be an idiot yourself and take it slow until you’re comfortable with the oddities and peculiarities of BDSM.

Good luck and have fun.


I just don’t see how a vanilla person would be attracted to this game…I mean seriously, don’t  people usually play for the sole purpose of meeting others? Thanks in advance for your feedback!

Posted in BDSM, Second Life, SL | Leave a comment

Mama’s Little Whore…


This is another blog post I found over at Dominant Soul. I for one love certain phrases or names that T uses and they definitely push my buttons and can at times push me over the edge to orgasm. It’s the combination of her voice, her control, and her knowing she has actual control that does it for me. I hope you enjoy the post…

As a Dom, I get very aroused saying the phrase “Who is My dirty little slut?” or “Don’t you dare cum without permission!’ I love expressing ownership and control over my sub. In addition, “slut” or “whore” are two key “hot button” words for my libido. My libido goes wild because they are such taboo & context-sensitive words for most women. I would never say those terms outside the bedroom to any woman but in the bedroom with my partner, they take on a specific understood meaning. Most people avoid using them fearing the backlash if used in the wrong context whereas I find their taboo nature empowering and arousing.


  1. What specific words/phrases (spoken or written) spike up your libido?
  2. Can specific words/phrases push you to climax?

Examples of “Hot Button” words/phrase for Subs:
(Theses are actual “Hot Button” words anonymously compiled from private emails from numerous subs on FetLife)

  • Daddy/Mommy
  • Mine / My ______
  • Toy / Pet / Naughty Girl / Kitten / Babygirl
  • Good girl / Good slut / Good pet / little one
  • Slut / Whore /Bitch / Cunt
  • Cockwhore / Cumslut / Fucktoy
  • “Who owns you?” / “Call me Sir/Ma’am”
  • “Who’s my naughty girl?”
  • “Whose pussy is this?” / “This pussy’s mine”
  • “Suck my cock like a slut!” / “Take that cock!” / “Take it now!”
  • “Cum for Me now!” / “Cum for Me kitten”
  • “You can’t come until I tell you” (whispered)
  • “I’m gonna fuck the hell out of you” (whispered)
  • “Good girl, take this cock/suck my pussy” (whispered)
  • “Do you like my cock in you/You love the taste of Mama’s pussy don’t you” (whispered)
  • “My baby girl’s pussy is so good”
  • “My slutty little girl”
  • “My pretty bitch”
  • “You’re my precious little whore”
  • “You’re my beautiful slut”
  • “You’re my lovely cunt”
  • “Which hole shall I abuse first? Hmmm…”
  • Do as you’re told
  • When I get home I want you_________
  • I want you on the floor in front of me
  • Get on all fours
  • Beg for it
  • Drink my cum/swallow it!

Important Notes:

  • It is important to recognize that the emotional connection of the sub to the person saying the words is much more important than the words themselves. The words only have power because of who is saying them, their voice and the specific characteristic of their speech (tone, pace, accent, emphasis, etc.). The sub’s emotional connection gives the person’s words this power. The same words spoken by another person may be insulting or offensive.
  • These “Hot Button” words are unique to each sub’s mind. Specific words/phrases have power for that specific sub. Learning what specific words carry power for a sub is like understanding how to arouse the body of a woman. It is specific and unique just to her.
  • Some women also find there are some words/phrases that resonate strongly when spoken (“Call me Sir” or “You are such a Good Girl”) and others that resonate strongest whispered (“You can’t cum until I give you permission”).


Do any of you have any “bot button” words or phrases that send you into oblivion? Please comment and share your experiences.


Posted in BDSM, D/s, D/s for beginners, dominance, erotic power exchange, lesbian, lesbian sex, Master Slave Relationship, submission, submissive roles | Leave a comment

Melting Point…


I found this post over at Dominant Soul and wanted to share. I for one am lucky enough to have such a loving and trustworthy Dominant and I immensely enjoy the act of her using her strong hands on my throat. It’s more than just the act, it’s who’s doing the act that allows me to melt beneath her hands. Here’s the post, enjoy!

Is This A Universal Turn-on for Submissives

For me, placing my hand on a woman’s throat is never about choking or breath play at all. It is about deep intimacy and incredible trust. I love to place my left hand on my sub’s throat firmly but gently. It is a very vulnerable and fragile place on her delicate body that which requires great trust and caring to ensure she is not injured in any way. Every time I have placed my hand on the throat of a woman, I have felt her entire body physically submit to me.

If you have ever watched a Momma dog discipline a pup, she will grab him with her mouth by the neck, hold him to the ground till he submits and lies still. It is a simple and clear way for her communicate her displeasure with his behavior. The primitive “lizard” part of our brains instinctively knows that control of the neck forces us to instantly submit…

The neck is a control point – a flimsy, fragile mechanism to support a heavy skull and large brain where major blood vessels and critical neural impulses travel to/from our bodies to our brains. Once we lose control of the neck, the battle is over…

For every woman (submissive & Alpha submissive) I have subdued by grasping their stunningly feminine necks, they have all become extremely aroused during sex and they have also mentioned after sex what an extreme turn on they found it to have my hands on their neck.

Warnings & Disclaimers:

  • * Do not attempt this with a new or occasional partner. This move requires a great deal of trust, familiarity and intimacy. Women mentally choose the males they are willing to submit to. If she does not trust you deeply, you will fail. If you don’t heed this warning, you may be face with the “Fight” response from her inner Amazon Warrior. You must discuss this move with a partner before attempting it. It can be a surprise in the moment but only if has been discussed prior and its within her limits.
  • * Do NOT attempt this with non-submissive women (Domme or switch). Most Domme women just HATE this. If you foolishly attempt this on any woman with a Domme or Warrior tendency, you will have you ass handed to you. You have been duly warned. You must discuss this move with a partner before attempting it to get approval.

Bonus Kinkiness:

  • If you want to truly ramp up the erotic power of this move to the next level, grasp her throat gently then slowly kiss your way up her neck towards her ear. When you reach her ear, whisper what you plan to do to her body & mind for the next few hours… That will get her mind racing and her juices flowing like crazy!! Refer to my earlier article – Licking Your Brain: The Art of Talking Dirty (https://dominantsoul.wordpress.com/psychology-of-submission/the-art-of-talking-dirty/)
  • The second level is to own her sexually and mentally as she reaches orgasm. While grasping her throat firmly in your left hand, force her to stare into your eyes. Deep eye contact is intensely arousing as discussed in my article “The Primal Power of Eye Contact” (https://dominantsoul.wordpress.com/psychology-of-submission/primal-power-of-eye-contact/). Maintain a steady, hungry stare into her eyes as you command her to open her legs wide for you. Then roughly slide your fingers into her pussy by pulling her panties aside without removing them. Stare deeply into her eyes as you finger fuck her hard enough that your palm is slapping her clit. Her orgasm will be incredibly intense with your hand on her throat and staring into her eyes.

Would you be turned on if your partner placed his hand on your throat? Why does this turn you on so much?


Posted in BDSM, bdsm for beginners, D/s, D/s for beginners, dominance, erotic power exchange, lesbian, lesbian sex, Master Slave Relationship, submission | Leave a comment